Parenting Henri

this is about henri, and the parenting thereof

henri is so cute. he even makes me want to wake up in the morning. 2008/04/30

when henri wakes up in the morning, he is generally in a bright and cheery mood! he contentedly squawks and squeals until one of us gets up to bring him back to our bed. since he’s not usually hungry right away, we give him a furry toy to chew on while we rest our eyes a little bit more. eventually, he will get frustrated/hungry enough that he’ll grab mark’s nose and wake us [back] up. his new rolling over technique is very useful at this stage. once we’re *really* awake, somebody gets up and makes him a bottle. then, he eats breakfast in bed while we get just a little more shut-eye before the horrible, tragic, day-away-from-henri-and-all-things-lovely-and-good-and-baby-centric begins. while we’re getting ready in the mornings, henri is all too happy to sit in his bouncy seat and play, along with more squaking and squealing of course. then, we drop him off upstairs with nani and/or papi, at which time the routine starts over with “giving him the fuzzy animal to chew on.”

have i mentioned i have the perfect life? and by perfect, i mean everything i’ve always wanted.

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and the award for bestest baby ever goes to… 2008/04/28

Filed under: change is good,great kid — lee lee @ 1:58 pm

this is what henri’s weekend consisted of:

saturday: spend all day with mark’s mom and her husband (he’s only met them a couple times before this); come home and go to bed

sunday: travel back and forth between old house and new house, with crap loaded all around him most of the time, while also getting a 2nd tooth and having to take naps in either the car or a brand new location; we also managed to squeeze in a trip to target

you would think by last night around 7 pm, he would not only be completely exhausted, but would also be cranky mccranky pants. but i have to say–he really wasn’t. he is “officially” the best baby in the world, or–at least–the most well-behaved. i mean, transitioning to a new house is worth mild crankiness by itself, let alone the rest of what we put him through… the only time he really got fussy was when that 2nd tooth really started moving in. other than that, it was henri-as-usual (cries when sleepy, hungry or has to burp). i don’t want to count my chickens before the eggs hatch or anything, but we might have the first redhead on our hands who isn’t a threat to his parents’ sanity! note: i did not say that he isn’t stubborn as hell, because he is…he’s just stubborn in a sweet baby, henri kind of way.

 

jealous, but just for a moment 2008/04/23

Filed under: working mom — lee lee @ 4:17 pm

sometimes i get jealous when i see parents playing with their kiddos at a park at 3 o’clock in the afternoon…but, then i realize i’m way too lazy to take my kid out to the park every day.  i’d rather watch HGTV in a nice climate-controlled atmosphere where there’s only one kid and not 1000.

then, i realize if i wasn’t working, i’d have to be the kind of parent who takes their kid to the park every day b/c i wouldn’t be able to afford HGTV or climate controls.

then, i get jealous of those oh-so-en-vogue working moms, who can play with their kids at night and on the weekends wherever they want (indoors, outdoors…doesn’t matter! we can afford either one!) because they are Working Their Butts Off to be able to do so.

then, i remember that i am one of those moms and i’m very, very glad that i’m not across the street playing with my kid right now.

 

i had fun last night, or even good parents need to drink (away from home) 2008/04/17

Filed under: date night — lee lee @ 1:23 pm

since henri’s teething, mcknight and i decided to leave him with nani last night for a few hours (not really…if i had known he was going to be THAT fussy from teething i would’ve left him with nani for the entire night…)

ahem. let me start over.

because mark is so lovely, he suggested we have a date night and go to charlie’s in harvard sq. to watch the red sox game. after i was sure my mom didn’t mind spending one little ol’ evening alone with her adorable, fabulous, not-really-that-fussy-for-someone-who’s-teeth-are-coming-in-at-lightning-speed grandson, i accepted, knowing i’d be hard pressed to have a good time without the little bugger by my side…

no really, sometimes you just need a night out, right? (why does this post sound more and more guilty…? i think it’s because i’ve been reading other mom-blogs by moms who [mostly] stay at home and see their children every waking minute AND even those moms do not blog about having a night out…) so, we went. to be honest, i did have a twinge of “i probably won’t see henri before bedtime” sadness, but once i took my first sip of that big raspberry beer, i let that go. added bonus: mark had presents waiting for me when i arrived. nice!

around about our 4th beer (i think i only had 3?), i pointed out that we would probably be the type of childless couple who postpones having children specifically because we like to go out, watch red sox games and drink the night away. mark didn’t wholeheartedly agree with me, but i think i’m right. it was fairly easy to give up nights in clubs wondering if anyone was going to “ask me to dance,” but a night out with the one i love??? well, thaaaaaat is pretty special. but then…maybe we wouldn’t appreciate it so much if we didn’t know what it was not to have it.

don’t get me wrong: i am not trying to say that we don’t have loads of fun with or without henri all the damn time. we’re just like the red sox: fun to be and good to watch whether home or away… BUT, it has been pointed out by a guy i know that we never really “dated.” what did we miss out on? the pressure of having to impress someone…wondering who’s going to pick up the check…deciding who’s bed to end up in… there’s none of that on Date Night. it’s just pure, relaxing fun. EXCEPT FOR THE RED SOX GETTING THEIR BUTTS KICKED. that is NOT fun.

so, thanks to nani and papi for putting up with a teething baby and aunt lakay for giving them a ride home. and thanks to wang for making the game look good for a while. and thanks to our ugly waitperson for serving up some good beer. and thanks to my sweetie, for suggesting we spend some quality time 2-gether. the night could not have possible without ya.

 

oh, compromise…my evil enemy 2008/04/16

Filed under: compromise sucks! — lee lee @ 11:08 am

my old friend double F used to say, “discipline? is that a province in canada?” i feel the same way about compromise.  only stronger… it’s not just that i’m not familiar with compromise; i actually don’t like it!!

but…relationships are made up of blah, blah, blah.  especially when you’re in a relationship that includes parenting (as i’m finding out).  sometimes i feel like all the reasons why mark and i make a good couple are the same reasons why our life is going to be Very Difficult as parents of henri.  to be frank, we just don’t look at the world the same way.

i’ll bore you the details of each and every “compromise” we’ve made so far (though i reserve the right to blog about them when i have more time/energy) and, instead, leave with you the wisdom i’ve come to over the past few months.  there are some things that are going to be extremely important to mark that i really don’t care about (i.e. sleep), some things that are going to be extremely important to me that mark doesn’t care about (i’m still waiting on one of these to pop up, but…i must hope…) and there are going to be some things that are truly important to both of us.

IN CONCLUSION, we can save our energy and only talk about 1/3 of the decisions regarding henri’s well-being.  er, uh…wait a minute…that’s not right…

 

i’m too mommy-sappy to appreciate the benefits of co-parenting 2008/04/15

Filed under: slacker mom — lee lee @ 4:09 pm

this morning was the first, probably since the 2 weeks postpartum where i wanted to die, that i really did NOT want to get up with henri (and he didn’t even wake up before my alarm went off). no, really…even on the weekends, i look forward to hearing his first little sounds of the morning–even though he is a signaler (and not a self-soother), he rarely cries; it’s more of a fussiness to let us know that he’s Finally Awake. i [usually] get up pretty quickly to see his contagious smile (that alone is worth the labor of getting out of bed), even if it’s just to bring him back to bed with me so he can play with his feet while we “rest our eyes” some more. but today–my first thought was mommy is too tired. luckily, mark got up surprisingly quick for someone who is oh-so-not a morning person and grabbed him and a diaper (wow!), allowing me to lie there and pretend like i was still asleep. of course, as soon as he was in bed, i couldn’t keep my eyes closed. sleepy or not, i was in henri-withdrawal. 🙂

 

Fatherhood (for those postponing fatherhood) 2008/04/14

Filed under: change is good,great kid,sleep is overrated — disperse @ 5:29 pm

I have several guy friends/a brother who are, likely (although they haven’t said so to my face), quite surprised that anyone would, more or less voluntarily, take on the job/duty/life-long-commitment of fatherhood. And I was right there with them when I was 29-years+364-days-old. That’s somewhat tongue-in-cheek – it didn’t exactly correspond, to the moment, with my thirtieth birthday – however, it was around that time that I began to think that fatherhood might be A-ok. Actually, it really hit me around the time that I became romantically involved with a woman who happened to be T-minus-two-or-so-months from motherhood.

OK, listen up, here’s the secret:

*… fatherhood isn’t really all that bad…*

Caveats:

  • Henri’s cute.
  • He’s really very reasonable… for an infant.*
  • He stays where you put him (not for long I fear).
  • He’s easily heft-able; portable (see above).
  • He’s really darn cute.

Subtract a couple of those attributes and I may have a completely different opinion. (Given the self-expiring nature of attributes three and four on the above list, check back with me in a month or two, okay?)

Really, what have I given up? A solid block of 7-8 (or 9, or 10) hours of sleep? Sure, but I’ve given that up voluntarily for weeks at a time. Sleeping in on the weekends is harder but it turns out that you really do get a lot more done when you get out of bed before noon. Henri requires a lot of attention but also likes spending a lot of time on his back admiring his feet. While he’s doing this I can do “productive” things such as lie on my back and admire the insides of my eyelids… or, more likely, watch Top Chef.

And an added benefit of having a kid when you’re 30ish is they’ll be out of the house by the time you’re 50ish when you’re young enough to enjoy the fact that the kid has finally-left-the-g-d-nest!!

*I mean, sure, he’ll take a deep breath and TELL YOU when something is bothering him (i.e. it’s been 2 hours and thirty-ONE minutes since he last ate and that’s really longer than ANY REASONABLE BABY COULD BE EXPECTED TO WAIT, DAMMIT!! AAAAAA-GHE-HE-HE-HE!!!) but, once you give him what he wants, everything is copasetic.